What makes a Scotsman grand.

[olderndirt]

A typically thoughtful Scottish husband was putting on his coat and hat to go out to the local
pub.
Turning to his wee wife before leaving he said, "Margaret - put on your hat and coat, lass."
She replied, "Ach dear heart, that's nice - are you taking me tae the pub."
"Nae" he replied, "I'm turning the heat off while I'm gone."

[pivo11]

In a Scottish classroom, the teacher asks a student, "If you have 5 pounds, and I ask to borrow 2, how many pounds do you have left?"

"5."

[Deleted]

<LMAO> Squared